The next day I woke up and I had such a strange feeling. I was feeling good and smiling. I was stretching myself when I noticed he was there, standing at the front of my bed.
What the hell was doing here? How could he enter the house and go to my bedroom?.
– ''Good morning! We have a lot to do'', he said with a big smile.
– ''A lot to do? What are you doing here?'', I asked him.
–'' I came to help you''.
Wait a minute .
- ''Help me what?'', I asked
- ''To change your life'', He said.
My life? What could he know about my life? That was too much. He was invading my space and my privacy. I couldn’t do anything about it and I was curious so I got dressed and went with him.
He drove for about 30 minutes.
– ''Where are we going?''
He didn’t say a word, he just smiled, no one could have that smile, nothing could compare to a smile like that, not even the sunset.
We arrived to a beautiful place, like a hidden paradise. Some people came to welcome us.
- El doctor llegò¡, El doctor llegò¡.
A little girl was shouting. The doctor is here she said. Doctor? Is he a doctor?
– ''This is my home and this is my family'', he said to me, smiling. I couldn’t believe these people were his family, of course he was saying that just because he had
a special feeling for them. I was trying to smile and not show my nerves, everyone was smiling and touching me, as if I was a new toy for a child.
– ''Can I know what are we doing here? What I am doing here?'', I asked impatient.
– ''I don’t know, Why did you come with me?'', he asked.
– ''Because you brought me here, you were in my bedroom and told me to come'', I answered immediately.
–''OK then, you came because you wanted to please me''.
This man is crazy; he was reading my mind or was he playing with it?
– ''I have to go back to my house''.
– ''Help me here, please'', he said looking straight to my eyes and holding my hand.
Those eyes were like windows , I could see he needed me there, and that I needed to please him
We stayed all the day, playing with the kids,helping to cook, curing their illnesses.
I never did any of this in my life. I did not serve anyone or help. I was the one to be served, but ironically I was feeling good, useful and thankful to that man for appearing in my bedroom that morning and for bringing me here.
He gave me a cup of coffee and said:
– Do you know why I am here?'', he asked.
– ''I have no idea'', ''help people!''.
I never liked guessing games and I was impatient, but I couldn’t resist my curiosity about this man.
–''I am here because I feel alive''.
I was speechless, that man, standing in front of me, told me something that I did not want to hear.-“Is this the only place where he feels alive?'', I though.
I went to that place to do the opposite, I wanted to end any kind of hope or expectation, I did not want someone telling me that. The last thing I needed was a positive thinker.-''I feel the way you are feeling now'', he said without looking at me.How could he know how I was feeling?. He didn't know anything.I was there to do things at my way, I started feeling uncomfortable, because the situation and because his words.
- ''I have to go'', I said and then started running very fast, he called my name but I did not pay attention , I was just following the car tracks. I was exhausted, I sat down in the sand and after some minutes the sound of a car engine brought my senses together and my breath back.
– ''You can’t keep running away, you have to face your fears'', he said.
– ''You don’t have any idea what my fears are, you don’t have a clue how my life is and who I am, so please step back and leave me alone'', I said with a very bad attitude.
He said nothing more and drove away.
Finally! I was alone, I started walking again and as much as I wanted to see the car coming back and Jack rescuing me, looking and smiling with that smile that paints his face, , he didn’t come for me.
I arrived at home at night: tired, dirty and feeling so bad and guilty, not for the effort that I made, but because I felt I had just wasted the last hope to recover my life , destroyed by my own critical way to be.
I was devastated, he did not deserve the way I talked to him. He was just being nice.
He was just trying to help me, but how could he help me if he didn’t know what was happening with me?
I went to bed after taking a shower, lying there looking at the ceiling, hearing the singing of the owl outside, some tears running down my face. I was not sure why I was crying. I held my pillow so hard, trying to squeeze out all of the pain and anger I was feeling.
During the night I opened my eyes waiting for him to be there again at the bottom of my bed, but he wasn't there.
What the hell was doing here? How could he enter the house and go to my bedroom?.
– ''Good morning! We have a lot to do'', he said with a big smile.
– ''A lot to do? What are you doing here?'', I asked him.
–'' I came to help you''.
Wait a minute .
- ''Help me what?'', I asked
- ''To change your life'', He said.
My life? What could he know about my life? That was too much. He was invading my space and my privacy. I couldn’t do anything about it and I was curious so I got dressed and went with him.
He drove for about 30 minutes.
– ''Where are we going?''
He didn’t say a word, he just smiled, no one could have that smile, nothing could compare to a smile like that, not even the sunset.
We arrived to a beautiful place, like a hidden paradise. Some people came to welcome us.
- El doctor llegò¡, El doctor llegò¡.
A little girl was shouting. The doctor is here she said. Doctor? Is he a doctor?
– ''This is my home and this is my family'', he said to me, smiling. I couldn’t believe these people were his family, of course he was saying that just because he had
a special feeling for them. I was trying to smile and not show my nerves, everyone was smiling and touching me, as if I was a new toy for a child.
– ''Can I know what are we doing here? What I am doing here?'', I asked impatient.
– ''I don’t know, Why did you come with me?'', he asked.
– ''Because you brought me here, you were in my bedroom and told me to come'', I answered immediately.
–''OK then, you came because you wanted to please me''.
This man is crazy; he was reading my mind or was he playing with it?
– ''I have to go back to my house''.
– ''Help me here, please'', he said looking straight to my eyes and holding my hand.
Those eyes were like windows , I could see he needed me there, and that I needed to please him
We stayed all the day, playing with the kids,helping to cook, curing their illnesses.
I never did any of this in my life. I did not serve anyone or help. I was the one to be served, but ironically I was feeling good, useful and thankful to that man for appearing in my bedroom that morning and for bringing me here.
He gave me a cup of coffee and said:
– Do you know why I am here?'', he asked.
– ''I have no idea'', ''help people!''.
I never liked guessing games and I was impatient, but I couldn’t resist my curiosity about this man.
–''I am here because I feel alive''.
I was speechless, that man, standing in front of me, told me something that I did not want to hear.-“Is this the only place where he feels alive?'', I though.
I went to that place to do the opposite, I wanted to end any kind of hope or expectation, I did not want someone telling me that. The last thing I needed was a positive thinker.-''I feel the way you are feeling now'', he said without looking at me.How could he know how I was feeling?. He didn't know anything.I was there to do things at my way, I started feeling uncomfortable, because the situation and because his words.
- ''I have to go'', I said and then started running very fast, he called my name but I did not pay attention , I was just following the car tracks. I was exhausted, I sat down in the sand and after some minutes the sound of a car engine brought my senses together and my breath back.
– ''You can’t keep running away, you have to face your fears'', he said.
– ''You don’t have any idea what my fears are, you don’t have a clue how my life is and who I am, so please step back and leave me alone'', I said with a very bad attitude.
He said nothing more and drove away.
Finally! I was alone, I started walking again and as much as I wanted to see the car coming back and Jack rescuing me, looking and smiling with that smile that paints his face, , he didn’t come for me.
I arrived at home at night: tired, dirty and feeling so bad and guilty, not for the effort that I made, but because I felt I had just wasted the last hope to recover my life , destroyed by my own critical way to be.
I was devastated, he did not deserve the way I talked to him. He was just being nice.
He was just trying to help me, but how could he help me if he didn’t know what was happening with me?
I went to bed after taking a shower, lying there looking at the ceiling, hearing the singing of the owl outside, some tears running down my face. I was not sure why I was crying. I held my pillow so hard, trying to squeeze out all of the pain and anger I was feeling.
During the night I opened my eyes waiting for him to be there again at the bottom of my bed, but he wasn't there.
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